I am feeling down tonight but no I am not suicidal. In fact this isn’t about me at all but the sad reality of what happens when people lose hope.
On Friday night there was a train crash near my house where someone was killed by a train. I had heard so many rumors about this one from the person was okay to they died to everything in between. I then heard that yes the person was killed but also heard everything from being a kid to an elderly person. Being that this was in town and being there was no car nearby I wondered if I knew this person. This was on Saturday when I heard about the crash and on Monday I got some horrifying news. Monday night I got an email from the head of the American Legion group I am active in and turns out the guy killed was someone who was active in the group like me. We spent a lot of time together and I really liked him because he was cool. I didn’t agree about his politics (he was still a huge Obama fan)or his religious views (he was atheist)but liked him. Often me, him and Fred A-Stare (I love that)the guy I am interested in would hang out after events.
Turns out what happened (or what I have heard so far)is he was living with his sister because he was long term unemployed and had a hard time finding a job. He did freelance artistic work but couldn’t find a full time job doing this. Him and his sister were fighting and he was planning to move in with Fred and his mother because they have an extra room. However last Friday he got drunk and got into a fight with his sister. He happened to walk outside as the Amtrak rode by and jumped in front of it. For a few days they couldn’t even identify him but eventually they did.
I am stunned even now. When I first heard about this my first thought was about Fred because he has been depressed lately and last week got a DUI. This guy was not the one I would have chosen to do this which makes it worse. I am waiting find out when the funeral is happening and yes I am going. I hope he finds the peace he never found here. I know he was bitter about being unemployed but I figured he would get over it and continue to truck on. Sadly he will never have a chance for things to get better.