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20. May 2012 by admin.
In 1979, when I was finishing high school and starting college, I read Howard Ruff’s How to Prosper During the Coming Bad Years. I was aware of inflation, was starting to understand what it meant, and I remember a few perilous months in early 1980 when the price of gold shot up, and it seemed at one point that the economy might go off the rails.
Now we face the same problems as back in 1979, only worse. Howard Ruff has updated How to Prosper. But we got through the last thirty years in mostly decent shape. There was no hyperinflationary collapse.
Why is this time different?
More specifically, the bad things that we feared at the end of the 1970s never materialized. Why should I worry this time?
Two thoughts:
In 1979, we had margin for error. That margin has been relentlessly squeezed out over the last 30 years.
Yes, it’s different this time.
Posted in Navel-gazing, Things Falling Apart, Money | No Comments »
24. January 2012 by admin.
The last month has been a blur. I pretty much missed the holidays: too much work, and when Christmas finally rolled around, I could hardly get out of bed. We didn’t have a Christmas tree, and after New Year’s, I had working weekends with 22-hour workdays. But last weekend was more or less normal, and my wife is still putting up with me, so it can’t be all bad.
Just after New Year’s, someone introduced me to last year’s Duran Duran album, All You Need Is Now. It is a pitcher of icewater in the desert of allegedly popular music. OK: it’s a blast from the past, but what makes it so good?
I usually trip over myself when trying to write about music, so forgive me if this is a little clunky. But Duran Duran’s music–when they’re not trying to be something else–speaks of a place of achievement, where logic and reason carries the day, where things work. It makes you want to set aside your pains and complaints and go out and accomplish something.
And for that reason, the title track, ‘All You Need Is Now,’ is my belated Song of the Year for 2011.
Posted in Holidays, Navel-gazing, Music | No Comments »
6. September 2011 by admin.
It rained all day today; the high temperature for the day was 69 degrees after midnight, and then it got colder through the day. That means that today is officially Retro-Rockets Day, the first genuinely cool day of the year.
I started using that expression to myself in high school: I got genuinely lazy during the summer, and when the first cool day arrived, generally some time in late August, I knew it was time to get out of my lazy summer orbit and prepare for school.
Many years ago, I worked as a subway conductor. When the first cool day came around in August, my immediate reaction was to pull out the cool-weather uniform (long-sleeve shirt and jacket), perplexing most of my colleagues. Even though my work didn’t really change with the seasons, I was still happy to see the first hint of fall.
Alas, I don’t have the luxury of lazy summers anymore, but I still celebrate Retro-Rockets day, at least within my own mind. It’s better being productive when you’re not fighting the weather.
Posted in Weather, Navel-gazing | No Comments »
30. August 2011 by admin.
During the storm last weekend, the old song ‘Windy’ by The Association came to mind. I remember it as a happy song from my childhood; I think one of our music teachers had the class sing it once.
Yesterday, while Googling around, I discovered that I have misunderstood the song for all these years. Apparently, it’s really about a drug dealer. And all the clever but flawed references to meteorology were actually references to a drug dealer and the effects of his (her?) wares.
I doubt that I’ll ever be able to ask the songwriter’s intent, so I’ll go by the music. There is music of druggies and music of achievement. ’Windy’ is definitely the latter: it is propulsive, energetic, and has a real melody. So I’ll believe that it’s a song about a pretty girl who enchants the beholder and doesn’t take crap from anyone.
And if you still want to believe that it’s about a drug dealer, I guess that’s your privilege. It’s still a free country, at least in that respect.
Posted in Navel-gazing, Music | No Comments »
1. August 2011 by admin.
When I was four years old, something happened–I don’t remember exactly what–that led me to consider the fact that I would ultimately die. I fretted about it for a couple of days, and then realized: people live to be 100, right? 100 is way more than four, so I have lots of time left. I then set aside contemplating my own mortality for a long, long time.
Today is my fiftieth birthday: I’m halfway there.
I thought there was something witty that I was going to write about this, but now that I’m here in front of my keyboard, I’m drawing a blank. Perhaps I’m getting flaky in my old age.
Anyway, it’s been an interesting first half, and as I sit here in the morning contemplating the day ahead, the second half should be interesting as well.
* * *
Last night, our alleged leadership came to an agreement on the debt ceiling. I’m not sure I like it, but that’s a subject for another time. In any case, the immediate emergency has been forestalled.
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23. July 2011 by admin.
The phone just rang a moment ago. I checked the Called ID: an 866 number.
I let the phone ring. After the fifth ring, it stopped.
In another time, I looked at Caller ID as a convenience, and the thought that I might not answer the phone because of the incoming number seemed, well, cowardly. If someone calls me with something unpleasant, I would take the call and face the music.
But now 95% of the calls on my landline phone are junk. Sometimes, I’ll pick up and hear the other end of the call disconnect. Or I’ll get an announcement from a machine. My response is to blow into the phone. A person will stop, believing that the line got noisy. When the voice goes yammering on about how I can save money on my mortgage or get out of debt or whatever, I hang up.
If nobody speaks, I suspect that the machine has called me, and will now connect me with a representative. If no voice comes on in two seconds, I hang up.
It turns out to be very rare that there’s actually a live voice at the other end that has placed the call and is waiting for a real answer.
My son has suggested that I ditch my landline phone and just use the cell phone. He may have a point. But having a home phone number always seemed to be part of the basic package of being an adult in this society, and I’m not quite ready to let that go.
But in the meantime, if it’s from a toll-free area code, or a place where I don’t have any relatives, I won’t answer.
OK, it’s cowardly. But it works.
Posted in Telephone, Navel-gazing | No Comments »
2. July 2011 by admin.
The other night, I found myself watching Up in the Air on the tube. The movie, featuring George Clooney as a traveling ‘career transition counselor’ (i.e. telling downsized employees that they’ve been fired) resonates with me at the same time as it bothers me. Is this what American business has come to, that the hot new field is helping other businesses destroy themselves?
In my own business, I’m busy: that’s part of why I don’t post here as often as I’d like to. But I’m compelled to wonder how long it will last. And I watch George Clooney do demolition, one downsizee at a time, as he wonders about being his own happy life of air travel being demolished as well.
About halfway through the movie, my wife came home and changed the channel. ”Thanks, Ducky,” I told her. ”You saved me from myself.”
* * *
Quickie Update: I did not need to wait for the rest of the summer for the Daily News to raise its price to match the Post. It only took one week.
Posted in Navel-gazing, Movies | No Comments »
18. June 2011 by admin.
It’s been a long time since the last time I did this; too long. It has been several years, probably even before I got married in 2001.
This morning, I’m pausing in the middle of my morning ride, pulling out my electronic thingie, and writing. In 1999, the ‘thingie’ was a Psion Series 5; today, it’s an LG smartphone, which is far more capable, but the Psion had a much better keyboard.
I’m hot and sweaty, but the endorphins are flowing: I’m feeling good.
Back then, I would write about my latest strategy for finding a girlfriend. The strategies never worked, but writing them down seemed to help at the time. Now, I worry about the economy. We’re in deep trouble, and nobody seems to want to address the real problem: that real productivity has moved out of the country, and what has come to replace it (finance, entertainment, education, health care) doesn’t generate the real value to provide jobs and support the government benefits that we set for ourselves in richer times.
But enough of that: I’m at the top of Prospect Park, the downgrade is calling, followed by a cool shower and lunch.
I’ll have to do this again sometime soon.
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20. December 2010 by admin.
About 20 years ago, my parents gave me a bailout.
I had gotten divorced and was broke, and had moved back to New York City. My job here paid better, but I still had a pile of installment debt from when I was married. So one day, my parents sent me a check for $5,000. It didn’t totally wipe out my debts, but it put a big dent in them, and I was able to better balance my books going forward.
I ultimately got completely out of debt, and then… I fell in love again, and got married. And one hates to say ‘no’ to one’s beloved. My new wife is more reasonable about money, so it wasn’t the crisis it was the first time, and things stayed under control. But I got further into debt when I went into business for myself. Today, I still am in debt, but I’m working to pay it back.
What can we learn from this?
Posted in Navel-gazing, Dysfunctional Government, Money | No Comments »
21. November 2010 by admin.
I like being married. I’ve been married and single, and for me there is no comparison: my wife brings me peace and happiness, which means more to me than the do-whatever-I-want freedom of being single. But for an individual, one always has a choice.
As a society, we’re stuck with having a government, whether we like it or not. But is it too much to ask that my government act like responsible adults?
My wife, like many wives I’m sure, asks me for stuff. Most of the time it’s perfectly reasonable, but sometimes she asks me for things that we can’t quite afford.
Sometimes I’d really like to get her whatever-it-is, and sometimes I’m not sure it’s worthwhile.
When I was married the first time, I tried to tell my wife , ‘no,’ and she would just make my life miserable. She thought we were rich, and that my resources were really infinite. So after some tension, I would give up and buy whatever it was, until I really ran out of money and credit. And then we got divorced.
My wife today is more fiscally responsible. Sometimes I do stretch to buy something if I think it would really make her happy. But I can tell her, “I’d really like to do this for you, but to do it would mean that I’d have to borrow and pay interest,” and she understands. And it works: although I’m still in debt from starting my business, it’s getting paid off, and I’m putting money in the bank.
In other words, we deal with money like responsible adults.
Meanwhile, our leadership seems to be unable to exercise even a little self-control. Most of what our Federal government spends money on is fixed by law: Social Security, Medicare, interest on the national debt. Only a small portion can be readily tweaked from year to year.
So if the government isn’t raising enough revenue from taxes to cover its expenses, then it needs to raise taxes or cut expenses. We all know that from managing our personal expenses. And sometimes, in our personal lives, being responsible means telling someone dear that they can’t have what they want, at least not now. Anyone with a spouse and/or children knows that can be unhappy. But if you’re responsible, you know that a little unhappiness now can work out better in the long run.
But our leadership seems incapable of making hard decisions. One can’t raise taxes, even if it’s prudent, because someone on the other side will say that it’s better to cut taxes, and enough people will believe him because nobody likes to pay taxes.
And entitlements are called–with good reason–the third rail of politics. President Bush, back in 2004, had a reasonable idea with privatizing Social Security. But even he could not kiss the third rail without getting badly burned.
The same drama plays out for New York State, stumbling from one crisis to another, with some faction of the legislature believing that the money will always come from somewhere.
When will they grow up?
Posted in Navel-gazing, Dysfunctional Government, Money | No Comments »
18. January 2010 by admin.
Sunday’s New York Post brought the story that Governor Paterson was seen in a New Jersey restaurant, being affectionate with a woman not his wife. The governor asserted that it was a business meeting, but it didn’t appear that way to a reasonable observer.
I’m disappointed. Not because the reporter didn’t get to the bottom of the governor’s relationship with the woman, nor because it’s yet another example of the stupidfication of the news. Shortly after Governor Paterson replaced the previous governor, he reported, as a pre-emptive strike to the gossip columnists, that he had had affairs in the past, but the past was past, and he was now having a happy, or at least functional, marriage. And now that seems in doubt.
But why should I care?
After all, if the governor cheats on his wife, she is the only real victim of the event, and it’s her decision as to how to handle it. It really doesn’t affect the rest of us.
Well, maybe.
I expect my leaders to have integrity and a sense of personal honor. Now I can’t follow the governor around and watch him make all his governmental decisions. And even if I could, I wouldn’t necessarily be able to observe his actions and determine that he had handled every situation honorably.
But I can observe how he handles what is, for many of us, a deep personal commitment. If he behaves honorably with respect to his marriage, I’m more willing to believe that he will handle his executive responsibilities with honor. It’s not foolproof, of course, but it’s a useful indication.
But then again, he works in Albany. What should I expect?
Posted in New York State, Navel-gazing | No Comments »
1. January 2010 by admin.
“Why would you want to be in a relationship?” my son asked me. “You can’t do what you want.”
I considered his remarks as I went out with my wife this afternoon to the Museum of Modern Art. Left to my own devices, I’m not much of a museum-goer; when I was living alone in the early 1990s, and I had a free weekend, I would go to see a movie and prowl the bookstores for a couple of hours.
But if all doors stood open, and I had the choice of doing what I wanted to do by myself or going to the museum with my wife, which would I choose?
It isn’t even close.
Things go much better with a companion.
Posted in Navel-gazing, Life Goes On | No Comments »
13. December 2009 by admin.
When I wrote my last entry, about three months ago, I had written some brief observations about the proposed ‘health care reform’ legislation, and said that I would write more about it shortly.
Three months later, the legislation has passed the House and is now under debate in the Senate. The Republicans hate it, but since the Democrats have 60 of the 100 seats, how the Republicans feel about it doesn’t matter.
Basically, the scheme is that all Americans will be required to carry health insurance that meets certain standards, either on their own account or through their employment. If they don’t have a satisfactory plan, they will have to pay a penalty to the Feds.
In addition, health insurers will not be able to discriminate against people with pre-existing conditions. That sounds really nice, but we already have a rule like that in New York, and one of the main effects of it is to make health insurance preposterously expensive, as it encourages normally healthy people to wait until something goes wrong before buying insurance. I once priced health insurance on an individual direct-pay account for my family: it cost over $2500/month. I was able to make a better deal than that, but it’s still very expensive. Most assessments of the new legislation concur that it will raise health insurance costs for most Americans.
Meanwhile, it doesn’t seem to do anything to actually contain health care costs, other than to cut Medicare reimbursements, something that has been on the books for several years, but is always overridden by Congress so that it has no practical effect. And the heavy lifting of actually providing coverage for people who legitimately couldn’t afford it is accomplished by expanding Medicare and Medicaid.
I would have understood, and even supported, a measure that would bring a Canadian-style system to this country, complete with measures to contain costs, as long as such a system did not preclude one from purchasing health care with one’s own funds or private insurance.
But we can’t do that, because we want to have our cake and eat it too.
* * *
Friday night, I watched the movie Kate and Leopold with my wife on the tube. (Silly question: when I ultimately get a flat-panel TV to replace the big heavy Sony in our bedroom, will I still call it ‘the tube’?) In the movie, Leopold, the Duke of Albany, is transported from 1876 to 21st-Century New York City to great comic effect.
What’s so funny about a guy from 1876? He speaks contemporary English; his dress is overly formal by our standards, but not too outlandish. But what makes Leopold funny is that he has what seems to us as an exaggerated sense of integrity and honor.
He speaks the truth when we in the 21st Century would issue jaded cynicism. He is asked to promote a product, and when he discovers the claims made about it are false, he flatly refuses. Most people today would either go forward with the promotion (one has to earn a living, after all), or make an exaggerated show of refusing (you see, people, I have integrity!).
Perhaps integrity and honor have beome anachronisms….
Posted in Health Care, Navel-gazing | No Comments »
20. August 2009 by admin.
I never liked hot weather.
Until a few years ago, I accepted summer as part of the human condition. More recently, I’ve become resentful with the hot weather, and annoyed with the TV weather reporters who make it seem so wonderful that it’s broiling out.
And now, I understand why.
Up until about 2003, my life slowed down for the summer. Ultimately, some years after the divorce, my son moved in with me, but spent much of the summer vacation with his mother. Work slowed down, too: ten years ago, I would commonly take a summertime Monday or Friday off as a vacation day, as everything was under control and there was nothing I urgently needed to do until the next ‘real’ workday.
But not anymore. In particular, work doesn’t slow down anymore. Business doesn’t have an off-season.
Posted in Navel-gazing, Life Goes On | No Comments »
1. September 2008 by admin.
I like to buy MP3 files from Amazon. I grew up buying music at record stores, and I resist the idea of paying $15 a month to listen to ‘my music.’ But sometimes a song will cross my mind, and it’s cool to be able to look it up and, more often than not, download a copy on the spot.
The other day, the Billy Joel song ‘All for Leyna’ crossed my mind. The song came out when I was coming to the sad realization that my high-school sweetheart was not going to be the love of my life. The lyrics resonated with my situation at the time, the imagery at the beginning was clever (’She / stood on the tracks / waving her arms / leading me to that third rail / shock….’) and ‘Leyna’ was close enough to my sweetheart’s name for, well, rock and roll.
Listening to it now, the pain is gone. My wife brings me peace and happiness, and my ‘Leyna,’ such as our ‘relationship’ ever was back then, is long, long gone. I downloaded the song, listened to it for a few times, and moved on to other things.
My wife wants to travel to Greece this fall. I considered the matter with some trepidation: ‘Leyna’ is Greek, and I went to some considerable effort back then to learn the language. But now my wife wants to learn some Greek in preparation for the trip: uh-oh. While in the city the other day, we bought a guidebook and an elementary Greek text.
To my pleasant surprise, that didn’t bother me either. Most of my recollection of the vocabulary is gone, but I think my sense of pronunciation is still there. I suspect that I’ll probably have a bigger reaction if I should ever have to write Z80 assembly code, yet another language that I learned at that time.
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26. July 2008 by admin.
For the last couple of weeks, my flaky Internet connection at home got even flakier, to the point where it was up for only a couple of hours in the middle of the night. “Call the cable company and complain,” my wife told me.
But then I’d have to dig up their phone number, and the account number, and wait for twenty minutes on hold, and then they’d tell me, “We’ll get right on it,” and then I’d probably have to call again. It was easier to simply live without it. Pointless Web surfing is a bad habit, except that I can’t update my blog.
A couple of days ago, the connection came back up: I guess someone else complained.
* * *
All of that is rather pointless, except as introduction to my current funk. If my mother saw me writing this post, and read the title, she’d knock me upside the head. “Stop your self-pity,” she’d tell me.
* * *
Yesterday afternoon, my wife called me at the office: there’s was a concert in Prospect Park, and she wanted to see it. As I read the description, it was a performance of music from the movie Powaqqatsi. I was mildly interested, so I agreed.
We got to the Prospect Park Bandshell, paid our admission, and I saw that we had a choice: we could sit on seats in the bandshell, or spread out beyond it, on the lawn. This is good, I thought: I had brought a ground cloth, and we could stretch out and relax, since the performance was not due to start for another hour.
Instead, my wife pulled me toward the bandshell, to the second row behind the seats that had been cordoned off for VIPs. I really didn’t want to sit in an uncomfortable metal folding chair for four hours, with no legroom, hemmed in by crowds so that it would be a major production to go to the can, but I’m the good husband, so I went.
Worse, I hadn’t brought my computer, or anything to read. But my wife had brought a play that she was studying for one of her classes, so at least I could read over her shoulder.
Powaqqatsi is one of a series of three movies about life and (although those responsible will jump up and down and swear otherwise) how modern civilization is screwing it up. There is no plot, no dialogue, not even any visual references to specific places: we’re somewhere in Asia or Africa or wherever, but we can’t quite tell where. The visuals are a series of mostly dreary images from these exotic locales, of people doing the little things they do to keep their world going. These are interspersed with images of our modern world, chosen and edited for ugliness.
This is accompanied by grinding music that is somewhat related to the visuals, occasionally echoing the sounds that would have been present during filming, but mostly just grinding. Sometimes, the music evokes a feeling of triumph, but there is no triumph on the screen. In fairness, the live music was the best part of the production. It would have been stirring if it had been presented by itself, or with better visuals.
Perhaps the real art of Powaqqatsi is that it causes a group of people to assemble themselves, experience it, and feel edified.
* * *
And while I was writing the previous section, the Internet connection at my house went down. About an hour later, it’s up again. I had better finish this quickly….
I went to Powaqqatsi by default: it was my wife’s idea. But if it was my decision, what would I have done? I probably would have wanted to watch the tube for a bit, and then go to sleep.
But what do I really want? If all doors had stood open, and I weren’t tired after a long work week, what would I want to do?
Alas, I really don’t know….
Posted in Navel-gazing, Life Goes On, Movies | No Comments »