Today is no better

I am on a hell of a rough road.

I am wondering how I am going to keep the ship afloat. I tried 2 more ads last week; by last Tuesday, one of the jobs was filled and I never heard from the other place.

Somebody commented “You’ve gotten more bitter in the last week.” Really? Ya think? Let me ask you this: if you had no job and none is forthcoming or on the horizon and YOU were the one who is now more or less paying the way for THREE people to stay under your roof and you don’t see much hope at all for anything in your life, see if YOU won’t be bitter about the turning of events.

I don’t even know what to say: it’s like everything horrible has happened to me.

I do not know how long this case will take to resolve legally; I was already told it could take MONTHS.

I am also looking for counselors. I can’t take much more of this; the last several weeks of my life has been spent chasing after this mess I am in and trying to legally have it resolved. And 2 more people show up and put themselves on MY tab???

How in hell is it even possible to not be permitted to evict somebody who YOU cannot afford to pay for, more or less?

So I am stuck with the bunch of them. This is a nightmare indeed, all of it. And I have to handle this alone.

5 thoughts on “Today is no better”

  1. Were your brother renting, you would be able to evict him for non-payment, even though that would take a while. Your problem lies in the doctrine of “joint and several” liability, which holds that joint owners of a property have equal responsibility for expenses. The fact that you have paid all the bills up to now does not give your brother relief from this, but it is a challenge to collect from him.

    The question that I’d ask is: what has really changed with respect to the bills that you have to pay now that Girlfriend and Child have moved into the house? Based on what you have told me, the property tax is unchanged, and the structure of the utility payments is unchanged. Unless you expect them to eat your food, what you have for the most part is no change in your costs, but a lot more pressure. You may have increased leverage to get him to pay the water bill because it would be really bad for a child to live in a house with no water, which might provide you with a route to have at least the child removed from the house because the water was turned off. It’s for the children, you know.

    Given that you have no income, will Legal Aid be of any help to you? It took about three months from the time that I reported that handyman to the police to bring him to trial (he asked for and received one continuance of four weeks, which is counted in that time), and it was another two months to get to small claims court because he did not pick up his summons, even though the judge ordered him at the trial to agree to service by mail, and I had the additional cost of having him served by the sheriff.

    1. I will find a way to find the money for this endeavor.

      I filed yesterday. It took about 12 days from the time I filed for divorce up until the time soon to be ex husband was served.

      I am guessing Bro will find out within the next 2 weeks tops.

      Holy cow…what a mess and what a huge one.

      And I still have not gotten a key. I am NOT going to ask for either key. It is better this way; do I need them accusing me of this or that? She might even say I took something of hers that is of value and forget that schizzle. No thanks; I have enough of a very large mess to unravel.

      He has made the most egregious of errors by moving her in here. You know that she’s going to be running the ship when it comes to the lawsuit — and to me, that is not only 1-NOT your call or damn business 2-it’s obstructing justice and most nearly contempt of court. And the damndest part of all: I cannot actively prove that she is. I know when this one makes her mark; he’s let her lead him around by the nose for 10 plus years. (He always has; he’s let his friends do the same so it isn’t just this person.)

      I am taking no nonsense. The faster he is out of here, the better off I am — but who knows when that is going to happen? it’s in my favor and will expedite the case all the more quickly that he has not given me either key (the ouster clause again) and maybe with a little luck it will go 35 days and he will not respond to the lawsuit. He’s got to sign for this, just like you do when you are sued for divorce, otherwise it is a default.

  2. Running on Bro’s tab, also:

    *The price for rent for my place downstairs, due to the ouster clause — I was potentially barred from my home

    *The rent for the roommate — half of what would be charged for tent of the apartment upstairs: Rents for a decent 2 bedroom place start at $2500 in this neck of the woods

    *Price for a 500 gallon tank of oil — heat season began 3 days ago; also price of maintenance contract for the season

    When the water bill shows up in 2 more months, he will be paying 2/3. He has 2 people up there now; I am not counting the kiddo for the water tab.

    This is in addition to what he is supposed to be paying half with me each month for.

    1. There are opportunities for your brother to extend the time before he goes to court by refusing to accept service of the subpoena to appear in court or by making it difficult for the sheriff to find him, though he does risk a default judgement if the judge agrees that he was served and fails to appear. I would also expect him to hide the money that he gets from the stock, possibly by buying a safe deposit box. I would also expect him to fail to cooperate with the interrogatorries, where he is questioned about his assets and where they are located.

      Were I in your shoes, I would ask for the key to the house daily. You don’t need one to your brother’s part of the house, though it would be good to have one in case of fire. There is no reason for them to restrict your access to the house.

      It sounds like you bought heating oil for your brother. I would have let them be cold, and then turn him and Girlfriend in to child protection for failing to heat the house adequately, should he fail to buy heating oil by 1 Nov or so. An unheated house is unsuitable for children. Of course, your heating bill is higher than it ought to be because you will lose heat to the unheated pat of the house through the common wall.

  3. There are opportunities for your brother to extend the time before he goes to court by refusing to accept service of the subpoena to appear in court or by making it difficult for the sheriff to find him, though he does risk a default judgement if the judge agrees that he was served and fails to appear.

    My atty has Bro’s work address. It is one county over; I do not know if a sherriff from this county will deliver a summons to somebody at a workplace in the next county. If he lived there, another story, just like it was with my divorce filing: my soon to be former spouse lived a county away from me at the time of my filing.

    I would also expect him to hide the money that he gets from the stock, possibly by buying a safe deposit box. I would also expect him to fail to cooperate with the interrogatorries, where he is questioned about his assets and where they are located.

    I don’t think he would be smart enough to do that. I plan on putting a lien on the stock money Bro is getting. I am guessing it is not that vast an amount, after fees and commissions are taken out.

    Were I in your shoes, I would ask for the key to the house daily. You don’t need one to your brother’s part of the house, though it would be good to have one in case of fire. There is no reason for them to restrict your access to the house.

    This is going to get dicey. I got information from another person that leads me to believe they changed the locks so that I would not be able to access the apartment; Bro is tired of me coming up there because when I do, it is to discuss what he owes me — and I have only been up there twice within the last 6 weeks, both times to discuss what he is not paying. Other than that, I have not spoken to him at all. Better I lie low, considering this case is going to court.

    And I do not want to ask because it will escalate into a fight. I don’t trust him or her; if I get the key, they may accuse me of coming up there and snooping.

    It sounds like you bought heating oil for your brother. I would have let them be cold, and then turn him and Girlfriend in to child protection for failing to heat the house adequately, should he fail to buy heating oil by 1 Nov or so. An unheated house is unsuitable for children.

    I do not know if I can call and turn her in. I would have to ask an atty about that.

    I have not bought heating oil for Bro. That tank has been dormant since 2007; a court will verify this with the oil people.

    And if I can get by on less than half a tank to last the winter, so can he. I turn the temp down at night and it is plenty warm. When I leave for the day, I leave the heat on so it is maybe 64 degrees. Again, it is plenty warm in here at that temp.

    Of course, your heating bill is higher than it ought to be because you will lose heat to the unheated pat of the house through the common wall.
    It is a bit *cooler* here than usual because he is not running the heat.

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